is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
