I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
