I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
