i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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