Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I will pee on everything he values.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
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