susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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