remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Are these your boobs on my camera?
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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