I'm lost and stupid without you.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
