Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Like sorry your dick wonβt suck itself?
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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