I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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