you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Randomize
