I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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