Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
