If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
we're making bets on your personal life
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
