Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize