Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
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