So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I need to sanitize my soul.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
