Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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