I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
