Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
