break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
