My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
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