If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
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