Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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