this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
