the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
But break dance skills will only take you so far
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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