i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize