sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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