Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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