Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
what day is it and did you see me today?
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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