just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
