Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
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