Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
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