I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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