He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
