She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
