Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Randomize
