it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
