What a fucking waste of an outfit
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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