can we get nightvision for the apartment?
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
