Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
