I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize