Whats the glycemic index on semen?
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Randomize
