Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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