I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
no more duck duck goose at the bar
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
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