Midget sex pt 2 tonight
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
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