Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
