he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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