Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
