Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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