That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
